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How to deal with very difficult manager where relationship is becoming Personal?

 
#1 How to deal with very difficult manager where relationship is becoming Personal?
24/01/2016 16:56

ChronicConsultant

Hi,

I'm halfway through my grad programme going for promotion this year. I received stellar feedback from my previous project and moved on to a new project at the beginning of this month. After 2.5 weeks I was told I was underperforming and that I'd be put on an informal improvement plan and that if things don't improve within 2 weeks, I'd be put on a formal one that will go to HR. To cut a long story short, I think there are personal issues between the manager and I. His feedback has never been constructive and has also made a couple of snidy unprofessional remarks. Also when delivering this news, he always seems to get a kick out of it. I could ramble on forever.

But what can I do in this situation? It's affected my confidence a lot, and I don't want it to affect my promotion case either which it likely Will..

I've written this without checking it so forgive any grammatical mistakes.

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#2 RE: How to deal with very difficult manager where relationship is becoming Personal?
24/01/2016 17:14

Bushy Eyebrow Partner to ChronicConsultant (#1)

Tell us more about those "snidy remarks", it will give a flavour of where your manager is "coming from"

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#3 RE: How to deal with very difficult manager where relationship is becoming Personal?
24/01/2016 18:01

ChronicConsultant to Bushy Eyebrow Partner (#2)

Without going into specifics a piece of work I had ownership was taken away from me and the individual said "I'm pretty sure x will get it done". Said individual has been here for 9 months mind you. There have been other examples as well. I just think certain things are better left unsaid / rather are uncalled (it's not constructive either other than making me feel like ****) for which is making me think it's becoming personal. It's all perception I guess but hey that's just the way I perceive it.

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#4 RE: How to deal with very difficult manager where relationship is becoming Personal?
24/01/2016 23:16

kari to ChronicConsultant (#3)

You should make sure you understand and accept the feedback given - remember that feedback is only ever a reflection of how other people see you; that in itself is important. Maybe it is personal, I don't know, but try to understand the criticism so you can do something about it.

I can see how this would affect your confidence and possibly your motivation too. Don't let it - it's important you step up now more than ever. Deliver high quality work on time - and do this consistently. Don't just do a good job, go the extra mile, overcompensate.

You might also want to speak to someone else you trust at work - ideally someone more senior who understands how things work in your particular firm.

I don't understand your last sentence - why wouldn't you check for errors before posting?

I should say I don't work in consulting (yet), but do have a few years' work experience (big 4 financial advisory) so hopefully that's helpful.

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#5 RE: How to deal with very difficult manager where relationship is becoming Personal?
25/01/2016 13:16

Bushy Eyebrow Partner to kari (#4)

It will pass, Chronic. Just do your best and don't let it get you down.

Oftentimes, if I'm feeling down, I just think of that eventful night back on 4 December 1971. It must have been chaos! Thank goodness for people like Funky Claude. The full story is told here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7mCK05dgwgU

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