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Wife or car

#1 Wife or car
22/10/2008 16:31


A thread recently made me think about whether its best to have a wife or a flash car. As I have already made a comitment to a flash car I am biased.

Pros- Cons (I sense a debate)

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#2 RE: Wife or car
22/10/2008 17:08

Tough One to Taxman (#1)

The relatively recent phenomenon of women working (potentially bringing in an extra £5k annually to the coffers) adds a different slant to this question but for me it still has to be the car.

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#3 RE: Wife or car
22/10/2008 17:14

JP to Tough One (#2)

Are the two mutually exclusive?

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#4 RE: Wife or car
22/10/2008 18:32

LOL to JP (#3)

How about both? lol

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#5 RE: Wife or car
22/10/2008 19:20

Options to deleted (#0)

How fit is the potential wife and which car are you talking about? How are we supposed to give a serious answer on the lack of information provided?

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#6 RE: Wife or car
22/10/2008 22:51

Taxman to Options (#5)

Dear Options, I sense you are a consultant, and have been involved in these discussions before.

The car is an Aston Martin DBS, a 6.0-litre V12 powered, race-bred, two-seater.

The potential wife is quite fit, but is very expensive to run.

Now when I weigh up the pros and cons the wife angle will inherit half my worth, depreciate rapidly and I wont be able to sell it quite so quickly, unless I find a rather keen albanian organ harvester.

The car is nice, but attracts the kind of venomous habridien that insists on being a wife.

And as you note some of these wife things can bring in as much as £5k a year, however I have noticed of late in the office that most of them seem to be getting pregnant as the work drops off and taking entire years out to care for their offspring.

This lack of attention to duty is quite disconcerting, especially when they could get hired help in to look after their sprogs (poppy the younger) and get back to work where they can at least be downsized.

Now a car..........

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#7 RE: Wife or car
23/10/2008 11:54

anon to Taxman (#6)

Car easily wins

The ride lasts longer (unless you are Sting apparently) and if it is attractive then you are likely to pick up numerous women who's daddy's are rich and therefore not requiring you to hand over paltinum card. Numerous women means substitution of the old for the new - no depreciation... (sorry couldn't resist the debate)

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#8 RE: Wife or car
23/10/2008 13:42

Blunt to anon (#7)

I hear you loud and clear my fellow hetero male.. I was in the same situation a few years ago...

The car is nice, really, really nice. The woman on the other hand (no pun intended) is really, really nice addition too.

You have looked at the PROS and CONS now look at the RISKS and COSTS. Ultimately, the two are mandatory requirements. I'll have a stab at this one for you..


Woman liable to run off with half of your assets.

Car attracts the devious sort (women).

Car prone to be scratched or worse, stolen to be sent abroad.

Woman can't be upgraded as easily.

Maintaining happiness of your wife.

Kids. Sleepless nights.

Car accident, injury...


Marrying and living with her.

Maintenance of the car (Servicing, Fuel, scratches, insurance etc)

Upgrades - woman and car, and I mean, plastic fantastic improvements and upgrading to the next car model

Cost of kids, house, clothes...

.. as for me, I had the car, attracted a gorgeous model who turned out to be a nymphomaniac, had a crash after a lunchtime meet with her, after she told me she was pregnant and after satisfying herself, had to repair and sell the car, get married and now suffering with a little baby which sleeps alot, eats alot and sh!ts alot...

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#9 RE: Wife or car
23/10/2008 14:02

gob smacked to deleted (#0)


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#10 RE: Wife or car
23/10/2008 15:32

what? to deleted (#0)

My soul just died reading that Blunt. Shame on you. Never share your thoughts again.

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#11 RE: Wife or car
23/10/2008 16:00

Evil Consultant to what? (#10)

In contrast to gobsmacked, I laughed so hard when I read this thread I nearly splorked my capuccino onto my keyboard.

Taxman and Blunt, you're very bad men...


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#12 RE: Wife or car
23/10/2008 16:49

feminist to Evil Consultant (#11)

I must say I find this thread pretty amusing. I didn't think educated men still talked about women in this way - in this day and age.

Anyway I'd would like to add my own piece to this discussion.... not a feminist rant mind you but just some practical commonsense advice from a smart woman to guys who get lured into this vicious circle of expensive car = expensive woman = expensive divorce.

1) A flashy car is the worst investment you could ever make. I would not be impressed at all with a guy that spends a small fortune on an 'asset' that loses value every time he uses it - I would think he were an idiot

2) There are of course women with a penchant for a certain expensive lifestyle that do not see it this way and instantly see cash signs in their eyes when they meet a guy with a car that signals that they can give her this lifestyle. Expectations are thus set high and these are the women that are "expensive to run", yearn to get married to you, have your kids then leave with half your fortune/ bankrupt you with high maintenance costs.

If the short term benefit of showing everybody that you are so sh*t hot that you can afford a luxury car and of consequence attract endless strings of gorgeous models trumps the even bigger risk of getting stuck with a clingy, expensive-to-maintain wife or even worse one who's only goal is to have your babies and ultimately halve your wealth when she's finished with you then go ahead - that's up to you - don't complain

3) It's the 21st century - there are plenty of decent to attractive looking working women out there (though probably not gorgeous models - but let's face it neither are you) who will actually share the load in terms of rent and expenses, won't just lie down in the bedroom and expect you do all the work, won't expect an allowance, are independent and not clingy/ needy, have a brain, are business-savvy and help you build an empire or invest in 'real' long-term assets like real estate, or multi-billion dollar businesses - think Tina Green, Melinda Gates, Laurene Powell (wife of Steve Jobs) or the other wives of many wealthy men who actually don't look like models but are nonetheless beautiful, intelligent and actually help you grow your wealth rather than deplete it.

But if the status symbols of having Ivana/ Melania Trump on you arm is so important to you - then I say get the car - I hope its worth it

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#13 RE: Wife or car
23/10/2008 16:52

Mars A Day to Taxman (#1)


Easier to get inside

Easier to turn on when you do

Dosen't get jealous of you admiring the rear bumpers of other cars

Less fun to soap up and wash with a sponge though

When you get the woman she weighs less than the car, 10 years later probably weighs the same

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#14 RE: Wife or car
23/10/2008 16:58

Darn it! to feminist (#12)

Feminist you were so close! I enjoyed and respected your post and very nearly fell for it! Then you ruin all your hard work by finishing with Ivana and Melania Trump!

And that's the main problem with us blokes; everything you say is correct, yet I (and probably most of us) just cannot see past the very obvious attractions of an Ivana or Melania! I'm nervously excited just thinking about Ivana sat in the passenger seat of my F430!

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#15 RE: Wife or car
23/10/2008 17:00

No to Mars A Day (#13)

Mars, you've already been warned about these forays into 'humour'..knock it on the head.

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#16 RE: Wife or car
23/10/2008 17:29

Mars to No (#15)

Good job I omitted anything about rear shunts then.

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#17 RE: Wife or car
23/10/2008 18:50

Taxman to Mars (#16)

Feminist, yes there are probably bright intelligent women out there who could not care less about material items. However they spend 50 hours a week 'advancing their career' and 'Gym'. When not doing the aforementioned they are attending events that I get dragged out to.

It should also be noticed that these women turn into what I can only term as 'Career Sexuals' for men its not too bad as we are expected to look rough and weatered with the strains and stresses of work, with women it more or less looks like they left the stove on somewhere. It should be noted that this is the rule not the exception.

And yes working 50-60 hours a week for an average of 50K or one that works 16 hours a week for £240 youll find they are about equal in terms of contribution and attention. Same goes for males on the above :)

I am going with car, and will tell potential spouse that wedding will wait until I have the cash for it, as I need the car for work.

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#18 RE: Wife or car
24/10/2008 09:05

Big Consultant to Taxman (#17)

Hey, No, Mars post was actually very funny.

Feminist, will you marry me?

I loved your entry about "won't just lie down in the bedroom and expect you do all the work". When I read about those dumb bimbos that sleep with celebarities and then sell their stories and say "he was rubbish in bed", I always wish I had the chance to ask them "What did you do in the action that made you fantastic in bed?".

It would be a joy to see them scratch their head not being able to point to anything they do in bed except lie there like a log.

I will correct you on one thing: Men don't have to be gorgeous (if they are it is a bonus), they just have to be talented in some way. Especially a way that brings wealth.

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#19 RE: Wife or car
27/10/2008 09:09

Pretty Consultant to Big Consultant (#18)

Interesting post - men are so funny...

I am an attractive intelligent female in our industry and I want to give you men some pointers.

1. Not all women like flashy cars - actually I find it a turn off, I like modest men.

2. It is hard to find a man that is good in bed, and yes I do know what im doing, im very active and enjoy the same in return! 5 mins is not acceptable!

3. The women who go after the men with flashy car and spend all your money are attracted to you because of the car! So if you want to avoid this pit fall - Don’t buy the car, or at least don’t show it off to get attention!

4. As for wanting to get married - Not all women are interested in this or at least its not their main goal in life - I want a man who can challenge me intellectually and is interested in politics, current affairs and has more to offer than money, a silly car or an ego!

5. And the real man look is most attractive - ie, not caring how you look to others just being confident in yourself is the biggest turn on of all. You don’t need the car just get some self confidence, no need for the £60k crutch to make you feel your worth a look!

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#20 RE: Wife or car
27/10/2008 11:16

Taxman to Pretty Consultant (#19)

I shall pass your tips onto the manly micra driving 'services assistant' at the local bowling alley, he fits all the criteria.

And the reason you want the car/house etc is due to human nature, either that of communism was misunderstood.

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#21 RE: Wife or car
27/10/2008 11:24

Mars A Day to Pretty Consultant (#19)

So buying that gold plated jock strap with an inbuilt Ferrari ignition key was a wasted investment then.


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#22 RE: Wife or car
27/10/2008 12:47

Big Consultant to Mars A Day (#21)

"It is hard to find a man that is good in bed"

Hmm!!! We have not met then. Hi, I am Big Boi.

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#23 RE: Wife or car
27/10/2008 13:05

Accenture's Dr Love to Pretty Consultant (#19)

Performance in bed. Delivered.

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#24 RE: Wife or car
27/10/2008 19:41

Taxman to Accenture's Dr Love (#23)

@Accenture's Dr Love

Go on, be a tiger!


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#25 RE: Wife or car
28/10/2008 17:28

Cheapskate to Taxman (#24)

Rent both

Cheaper in the long run

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#26 RE: Wife or car
30/10/2008 10:16

chameleon to Cheapskate (#25)

ahhh ....oestrogen and testosterone.. so much to answer for.

Pasty-faced-schoolboy-haircut-'windswept'-consultants going after ironing-board-backsided-hair straightener-minimal-suit-and-accessory clad consultants......


personality, humour, interest, sexual prowess.

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#27 RE: Wife or car
30/10/2008 11:33

Taxman to chameleon (#26)

Sorry this is not 'Top' and Top Investment has a lot for sale :)

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#28 RE: Wife or car
06/11/2008 16:50

chameleon to Taxman (#27)

you're right taxman -it's not.. but haikus (think I over did the syllables) are so much more fun...

yawn (again) ...

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