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How long should my arms be to maximise impact?

 
#1 How long should my arms be to maximise impact?
16/03/2007 15:08

braindead

I've heard that all of the best consultants have one arm just long enough to rest casually in their pocket whilst the other is approx 30% longer so that it can be made maximum use of when giving powerpoint presentations.

I'm 27, earn 60k and bought a house 7x my gross salary, I have a Porsche. How long should my arms be?

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#2 RE: How long should my arms be to maximise impact?
16/03/2007 15:13

thread bare to braindead (#1)

A-ha, a real question at last!

One should be the length of a childs skip and the other about as long as a piece of string.

Unless you are an over performer of course, then your arm would have turned into rope at the age of 24 and you'd have leveraged it to gain capital shares.

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#3 RE: How long should my arms be to maximise impact?
16/03/2007 17:33

oo to thread bare (#2)

Who cares? What we really want to know is what sort of haircut this successful consultant has.

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#4 RE: How long should my arms be to maximise impact?
16/03/2007 20:12

anon to braindead (#1)

This reminds me of a sh*tty induction exercise I had to do during on-boarding week.

We had to draw a picture of the ideal consultant, illustrating how they personified the Firm's core values and behaviours.

If I hadn't had the opportunity to draw a picture of an androgenous consult-a-clone with a suit and a briefcase, I wouldn't feel fully equipped to demonstrate "professionalism" in my daily life.

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#5 RE: How long should my arms be to maximise impact?
16/03/2007 20:15

anon to anon (#4)

And yes, it was a bespoke super-140 blend suit with side-vents. But the briefcase was a consult-a-clone corporate-issue laptop bag.

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#6 RE: How long should my arms be to maximise impact?
17/03/2007 02:16

anon to anon (#5)

meh to super-140s, even Graduates are toting super-180s nowadays

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#7 RE: How long should my arms be to maximise impact?
17/03/2007 10:13

Aspire to braindead (#1)

Hi Braindead.

Quick question - What do you do and which company do you work for ?

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#8 RE: How long should my arms be to maximise impact?
18/03/2007 01:00

braindead to Aspire (#7)

Mars & Co

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#9 RE: How long should my arms be to maximise impact?
18/03/2007 01:32

Anon to braindead (#8)

Mars? Oooooh.

Never mind.

But I'm reliably informed that they like a uniform arm length across the whole company. Anyone who doesn't fit into their strict mould is immediately chopped down to size.

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