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#1 Outed
24/02/2006 23:37


Hello All,

I have been asked to resign at my cirrent employers and accepted. The reason is because of performance.

I think the reason the view that my performance was not good was seen is because there was a personaility clash with the managers.

I will want to go to other consultancies.

What do i say?

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#2 Re: Outed
25/02/2006 00:28


Take them to tribunal for discrimination. It is disgusting that tney should be so prejudiced in this day and age about the fact you are gay.

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#3 Re: Outed
25/02/2006 09:32


Try IBM - they hire anyone who turns up to interview

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#4 Re: Outed
25/02/2006 11:07

john mcbride

Where did gay come into it? is that what "outed" means?

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#5 Re: Outed
25/02/2006 14:40


Sorry maybe i was not so clear in my initial post. I actually was talking about the up an out process. I was asked to leave because i was not being promoted.

I just feel i did not have the right support structure and relationship with my manager and that was the reason i was not promoted.

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#6 Re: Outed
25/02/2006 19:39

john smith

if you are quick there is no reason when anyone will even know that you have been asked to leave. just say at interview that you are wanting to move for career progression. career progression normally translates as wants more money so just give that impression.

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#7 Re: Outed
28/02/2006 12:36


Not an easy situation to be in, especially if you feel there are attenuating circumstances. Being asked to resign is a little cheeky though...sounds like your employer is scrimping on severance pay. Any idea what happens if you say "no", i.e. negotiate some kind of leaving package?

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#8 Re: Outed
28/02/2006 12:59


What happening is that that they are giving severance pay - essentially asking me to leave. If i dont...dismissal proceedings will be taken against me - which i def dont want.

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#9 Re: Outed
28/02/2006 13:54


Go see an employment lawyer. Take your employment contract and the firm's employment policies/procedures manual. An hour of his/her time won't cost you more than £200 and you'll be in a much better position to know what to do afterwards.

Think of the implications for finding another job if you are already out of employment. The first question you'll be asked is why you left without another job to go to.

What about the reference you'll be given by your old employer?

Don't do anything without advice. There's more riding on this than you seem to think. Your employer has rights....but so do you.

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#10 Re: Outed
28/02/2006 15:02

previously redundant

I agree you need a lawyer. Nobody wants to go to court so this is a negotiation. The strength of your position depends on the circumstances. A lawyer will advise what is reasonable to negotiate in your circumstances. Then you can make an informed decision as to whether to accept or decline their offer.

The negotiation is not just about severance payment. You might also ask them to pay your lawyers fees and for career counselling. In addition you should ask for a written reference to be placed on file as part of the severance agreement. The latter costs them nothing but will give you some peace of mind.

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#11 Re: Outed
28/02/2006 19:29


I think I can guess which firm this is, and if I'm right there is quite alot of this going on right now. They are trying to manage headcount.

Going to a lawyer won't look good to either party in the long run. I've heard people are being offer 6 months salary to hand in their notice, so ask for that. If they give it to you, then I suggest you register with a couple of recruitment consultants, go travelling for 3 months then come back and find a job. You cant tell future employers that you wanted a career break and thats why you left. Having had time away to think about things you've decided you now want a new challenge in your career etc.

This way you don't look bad when talking to future employers, and leave because you resigned and not because you were forced out on a performance management process (which will never sound good on your reference). And you should get a chunk of cash too.

Good luck!

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#12 Re: Outed
28/02/2006 21:22

previously redundant

For sure you should avoid communicating through formal lawyers letters. However his should not stop you getting professional advice.

In my experience employers can offer a generous deal. However in many cases they offer less than they should. The reason for the latter is that many people do not take professional advice and accept the first offer made.

Without advice you have no idea whether your employer is offering a good deal or not.

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#13 Re: Outed
28/02/2006 23:00


Thanks for your help.

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#14 Re: Outed
01/03/2006 17:45

Ex Big 4

You could get a lwayer involved - you could sue etc as they haven't gone through the G&D process - but they'll just turn round and put you through the process and you'll be out without a pay-off and you'll go through weeks/months of tribunals etc and your next employer will find out and be very wary of that. The key is to get as big a payout as possible (plus Outplacement/Career advise etc) but the main thing is to confirm what kind of reference they will give you. Normally in these situations it a at worst a neutral reference and states that you left due to redundancy. As long as it says that you can tell your next employer anything you want and they'll never know why you were outed!

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#15 Re: Outed
02/04/2006 01:10


So is it true that you're gay?


If this is the reason for your dismissal, then I'm just appalled.

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#16 RE: Outed
08/06/2007 09:56

outed to Confused (#15)

yup. I'm gay.

it was part of the reason. I was caught in a compromising position with another male worker.

Management didn't take too kindly to it.

It's ok now. New job, new life. Finally out of the closet.

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#17 RE: Outed
08/06/2007 10:36

Mars A Day to outed (#16)

Alot of it about these days. I think its appalling.

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#18 RE: Outed
08/06/2007 11:33

Anon to outed (#16)

I'm really sorry to hear that this has been any part of the current decision making process - it reflects poorly on your firm, and you would be right to 'name and shame'.

My advice would be to hold your head high, take the (good) advice that has been offered (and the cash!) and move on - they're not worth it!

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#19 RE: Outed
08/06/2007 16:28

Taxman to jim (#3)

IBM dont anymore mate

try CapGem

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